Heart Eyes
by artificialheart
Summary: Sam and Sebastian celebrate Seb's birthday by going on a date together. Jodi is oblivious, Robin is a Cool Mom, and Haley begrudgingly helps Sam bake a cake.
1. Chapter 1

Haley scowls as she peers into the plastic mixing bowl. "What did you do?"

"Um, I added the food colouring? Like you told me to?" Sam gives the mixture a couple extra stirs, but it stays the same shade of grey. He frowns. "Maybe I didn't add enough. Should I add more?"

Haley takes the mixing bowl from his hands. "No, I think you've helped enough."

Sam's mom chooses that moment to step into the kitchen. "Everything okay in here?" She's been giving Sam these weird smiles all morning – Sam suspects it's because he's finally spending time with a girl that's not Abigail – but now it's been replaced by a look of concern.

"Do you have any more powdered sugar, Jodi?" Haley asks, in a much more pleasant tone than the one she's been using to address Sam. "Sam ruined the frosting."

"It's not _ruined_." He sticks a finger into the mixing bowl, then pops it into his mouth. "It tastes fine." Haley and Jodi look at him with matching expressions of distaste.

His mom sighs. "Sam, don't put your fingers in the frosting. Your brother knows better, and he's half your age."

Sam rolls his eyes once his mom's not looking. "Sorry, Mom."

Jodi crosses the kitchen, and starts opening cupboards, pulling out bags and boxes and bowls of every size. Sam wonders why they have so many different bowls. Would cereal be better if he poured in a giant mixing bowl? It probably would.

"I don't think we have another bag," his mom tells Haley, once she's checked every cupboard. "Should I run and grab some more from the store?"

Haley folds her arms over her chest, and glares at Sam before letting out a sigh. "No thanks, Jodi; it's fine. I'll see what I can do with Sam's… creation."

Jodi gives Haley an apologetic smile. "Let me know if you need anything, alright?" She also gives Sam a stern look, before leaving the two of them alone in the kitchen again.

"I don't know why you're bothering with this, anyways," Haley says, as she dips a spatula into the mixing bowl, and begins to spread frosting over the cake. "You could just buy Sebastian a cake; it's not like he'd care." She glances over at the doorway, then lowers her voice, "Or just blow him."

Sam's face turns as red as the cinnamon heart candies that are _supposed_ to go on the cake, but have mostly just ended up in his stomach so far. "Dude. We're not… we're just _friends_ ," he hisses, "got it?"

"Right." Haley smirks. "You're just baking Sebastian a birthday cake, with little hearts on it, because that's what _bros_ do, right?" She pops one of the heart candies into her mouth. "Yoba, guys get _so_ hung up on their sexualities."

"You don't know what it's like," Sam mumbles. "Haven't you seen the way my mom's been looking at me all morning? How stoked she is that I'm finally spending time with a girl?" He crushes one of the heart candies under his fist. "She's gonna be so disappointed when I tell her." Sam sighs, tracing a pattern in the candy dust. "I don't even know how."

Haley's face softens. Sam's pretty sure it's the first time he's seen her give another person that look; she usually reserves it for the rabbits at the fall fair petting zoo. "Look, I'm not going to pretend to be your friend, okay? But my sister's a really good person to talk about that kind of stuff with. She'd be really happy to help you."

"Uh, thanks," Sam says, trying to mask the surprise in his voice. "I'll… um, think about it, maybe."

Haley leans forward, her voice dropping so that it's just barely audible. "So is it true, then? About you and Sebastian? Because Emily _refuses_ to tell me anything."

Sam really hopes his mom hasn't overheard any of this conversation from the living room. He hesitates, then nods at Haley.

She smirks. "I knew it."

Haley stays long enough to help him clean up the kitchen, and his mom helps him box up the cake in a clear plastic container. Sam's really glad that the heart candies never ended up making it onto the cake, because he's pretty sure his mom would ask why he's putting little hearts on a cake for another guy.

Vincent wanders into the kitchen as they're finishing up, holding a piece of paper. "Sam!" he says, shoving the paper into Sam's hands. "I made something for Sebastian!"

Sam studies the paper. It's one of Vincent's best drawings for sure, although he might be a little biased. It's a picture of him, Sebastian, and Vincent, out by the mountain lake. He's holding hands with Sebastian, and oh, Yoba, there is no way Sam's showing this card to his mom. _Especially_ not with Vincent there to explain it.

"It looks great, Vince." Sam reaches out, ruffling Vincent's strawberry blonde hair, and his little brother grins up at him.

"How _cute_ ," Haley says, peering at the card over his shoulder. Sam quickly folds it in half.

"I'm gonna get ready to head over to Seb's," he tells his mom, sticking the folded up card in the back pocket of his jeans. "I'm sleeping over; I'll call you when we get back from the city." He thanks Haley, too, before backing out of the kitchen. Sam can't say it out loud, but he hopes she knows that it's also for the advice, and not just for helping him with the cake.

Most of his stuff's already packed in his backpack – sleepovers have become increasingly common since they started dating, so all Sam really needs to do is swap out his clothes.

Vincent trots in after him as he moves onto packing Sebastian's gift. "What's a… chem-ical romance?" Vincent sounds out, peering at the shirt as Sam struggles with the wrapping paper.

Sam smirks. "It's Seb's favourite band."

"My favourite band is your band," Vincent says, flopping back against the bed, and crinkling the wrapper paper that Sam's just finished cutting.

"Aww, thanks little dude." He smiles at Vincent, who grins back at him. Sam's not sure that Vince's even heard any of their songs – and to be honest, Sam hopes he hasn't, because they've gotten pretty sappy lately.

"Sam you're gonna put my picture in too, right?"

Sam pulls the drawing out of his back pocket. "Of course," he assures Vincent, slipping the card under the wrapping paper, before taping the whole thing together. It's a little messy looking, but hopefully Sebastian won't mind. "Seb's gonna love it."

With his bag ready to go, Sam collects the cake from the kitchen, and then heads up towards the mountains. He finds Sebastian in his basement room, hunched over his computer as usual.

"Hey, no working on your birthday," Sam scolds.

"I'm not working," Sebastian protests. He pushes himself away from the computer desk, and rolls his chair over to where Sam's standing.

Sam holds out the cake, and Sebastian stands up to inspect it. "Happy birthday, dude! Haley helped me make it."

Sebastian looks down. "Um, is it supposed to be grey?"

"Uh, no," Sam admits. "Haley's speciality is pink cake, and I knew you'd roll your eyes if I gave you anything pink, so I tried to dye the frosting purple instead… and it didn't really work. I also, um… kind of ate all the candy that's supposed to go on top."

"This is the worst pink cake I've ever seen," Sebastian says, accepting the cake. "I love it."

"It tastes fantastic," Sam reassures him. To prove his point, he swipes his thumb along the top of the cake, and holds his hand out towards Sebastian. "Try it."

Sebastian's eyes widen, and Sam comes to the sudden realization that asking Sebastian to lick frosting off his fingers is maybe a little _too_ intimate. Then Sebastian leans forward, taking Sam's thumb into his mouth, and the way his lips and tongue and teeth move against Sam's skin almost makes Sam moan.

Almost.

Sebastian pulls back, looking far too pleased with himself. "It's not bad… hope you washed your hands."

"Um," is Sam's eloquent response, because now he's distracted by thoughts of how Sebastian's mouth would feel on other parts of his body. "Yes." Sam needs a distraction, before all the blood that's rushed to his face starts to head south. He looks back down at the cake. "You should probably hide that, so that no one eats it while we're gone."

"I don't think that's going to be an issue."

Sam shrugs, and takes the cake back from Sebastian, setting it down on the table they use for their Solarian Chronicles sessions. Sebastian takes a seat on his bed, and Sam's quick to join him after digging Sebastian's present out of his backpack.

"Here, open your present," he says, thrusting the badly-wrapped gift into Sebastian's hands.

Sebastian sits up to open the package. "Did you let Vince wrap this?" he asks, smirking at Sam.

"Shut up," Sam whines, "I did my best!"

He turns Sam's gift over, examining the size and shape, and then weighs it in his hands. Sam nudges him. "Open it Seb, stop trying to ruin the surprise."

"It's clothes," Sebastian says, as he starts to work at the wrapping paper. He opens the gift slowly, methodically, as if he's going to save the paper for something.

Sam groans. "Just rip it open, man, come on.

"Oh," Sebastian says, once he's finally finished with the stupid wrapping paper. Sam's expecting the usual retorts about how Sebastian hates that band, that he never listens to them (despite the secret playlist Sam knows he has), but Sebastian just leans over to kiss him instead. "Thanks," he adds, pulling back.

"Okay, but do you _like_ it?" Sam asks. "Because that was an extremely un-Seb-like response."

"Didn't really want to be rude about the first gift you gave me as my boyfriend," Sebastian admits, giving him a shy smile. "But yeah, I like it, thanks. And the card's cute, too."

Sam smiles back, then leans in to kiss Sebastian again.

"If you tell Abby they're my favourite I'm still gonna kill you, though."

"I think she already knows, dude. Now put it on," Sam encourages, "I wanna make sure it fits! They didn't have an extra small in men's sizes, so I just had to order you a small. Do you think that's too big?"

Sebastian rolls his eyes. "I'm not _that_ small, Sam." He slips out of his old shirt, and tugs on the new one. "See? It fits fine."

"Really? 'Cause it looks a little big to me," Sam says, smirking.

"Oh fuck off," he replies. "You just wanted an excuse for me to take my shirt off." Sebastian pulls his faded black hoodie back on over his new shirt. "Hope you enjoyed the show. Maybe if you're good I'll let you take it off later."

Sam feels his face flush again, and Sebastian grins at him. They'd just started getting comfortable about changing in front of one another, but taking each other's clothes off? That was new. "I'll, uh… I'll be on my best behaviour?"

"You'd better," Sebastian says. Then his boyfriend grabs a fistful of Sam's shirt, and tugs him into an open mouthed kiss.

They're soon interrupted by a set of heavy footsteps descending the stairs outside Sebastian's room, and Sam quickly pulls back, his hair mussed and his cheeks pink. Thankfully, Robin's the type of mom that knocks, and actually waits for an answer before coming in. Sam's mom doesn't.

"Sebby?" Robin calls from the other side of the door. "Can I come in? I wanted to give you a gift before you leave!"

"Door's unlocked," Sebastian calls back, as Sam scrambles to straighten his shirt.

The door opens and Robin steps inside, holding a present that's much more carefully wrapped than Sam's was. "It's just something small… do you want me to leave it on your desk, Sebby?"

"Nah," Sebastian replies, "I'll open it now."

Robin beams at him as she walks over to the bed, and hands it over. Sebastian opens the second gift just as slowly as the first, and Sam has to fight back the urge to give him shit about it. He looks pleasantly surprised by Robin's present – a black pair of pajama pants, dotted with little green frogs. "I like these. Thanks, Mom."

"I knew you'd like them because they're black!" Robin explains, still managing to sound far more excited about the gift than Sebastian.

"I'll try them on later," Sebastian promises, setting them aside on his pillow. "Oh, and mom? Sam's staying over tonight."

"Do you want me to get you the air mattress, honey?" Robin asks, turning her attention back to Sam. "I wouldn't want you falling out of bed." She winks at him as she says it, and Sam's cheeks go pink.

"Nope, that's okay," he answers quickly. "We like sharing. It's warmer that way, you know?"

Robin smiles at him. "Well, okay! Seb, let me know if you're going to be home for dinner, alright? If you want I can make you some pumpkin soup. Oh, and text me when you get to Zuzu!"

"Pumpkin soup sounds good," Sebastian agrees. "Uh, is that okay with you, Sam? Or did you want to grab dinner before we head back?"

"It's your birthday dude!" Sam reminds him. He does like the idea of coming back earlier for dinner, though – there's far more privacy for the two of them in Sebastian's bedroom than out on the streets of Zuzu City.

"We'll be back for dinner, then," Sebastian tells his mom. He stands up, and motions for Sam to follow him. "We're should head out now if we want to make that appointment."

"Appointment?" Robin repeats, before they can make it any further.

Sebastian reaches for the motorcycle jacket that's draped over the back of his computer chair. "Yeah, it's at a place called Immortal Ink? They're doing a two for one deal on piercings, so we're both going to get one."

"Ooh, what are you getting?" Robin inquires. "One of those ear bars? Those are kind of cool."

"They're called industrials, Mom... and no, I was gonna get my septum pierced."

Robin's smile suddenly looks very forced. "Oh, well that's… fun."

Sebastian rolls his eyes. "I'll flip it up around Demetrius." To Sam, he mutters, "Gonna flip him something else, too."

"Wear your helmet, please!" Robin calls after them as they leave Sebastian's room.

Sam follows Sebastian outside, and into the garage. "Here," Sebastian says, holding out his helmet.

"Nah," Sam declines. "It's gonna mess up my hair."

Sebastian shoves the helmet into his hands. "Your entire head is going to get messed up if we crash," he says, his tone unusually stern. "And if a crash doesn't kill us, your mom definitely will."

"That's fucking morbid, dude," Sam replies. He looks down at the helmet – black, with a couple nasty looking scuff marks. Sam wonders how many spills Sebastian's taken on his bike. "What are you going to wear?" he asks, as he turns the helmet over in his hands.

Sebastian shrugs. "I've only got the one helmet," he says, in place of an actual answer. "You wear it."

"Seb-"

"It's fine," Sebastian insists. He turns away from Sam. "I'm gonna smoke myself to death one day anyways, what's the big deal?"

Sam inhales sharply. He sets the helmet down on the seat of Sebastian's motorbike, then reaches out to grip Sebastian's shoulders in his now-free hands, turning his boyfriend around to face him. "Hey," Sam says, in a voice that's nowhere near steady as he needs to be, "don't say things like that."

"Sorry," Sebastian replies, but he's still not looking Sam in the eyes. "Bad joke. Let's just go, okay? I don't wanna argue with you on my birthday."

"I don't wanna fight, either," Sam reassures him. "I just… I wanna know what's up." He leans forward, nudging Sebastian's nose with his own, and Sebastian's eyes finally flicker up to meet his. "Seb is everything okay? You never worried about helmets before."

"I've just been thinking," Sebastian answers, slowly. "I don't want to lose you."

Sam grips his shoulders tighter. "Seb, I'm not going anywhere-"

"The same way my mom lost my dad," he continues. "My real dad."

"Your dad died in a motorcycle accident?" Sam says, and then he winces internally, because he's pretty sure that's the wrong thing to ask.

"Car crash," Sebastian corrects him, "but yeah."

Sam swallows hard. "Shit."

He'd always known that Sebastian's biological father wasn't in the picture. Figuratively, but also literally – Robin had shown Sam a _lot_ of baby photos. His best guess had been that Sebastian's father was a deadbeat. Sam could relate to that; he'd lived a large portion of his life without any sort of father figure. He'd lamented about it with Sebastian, too, figuring they had that in common.

Yoba, he was such an idiot.

How many times had he complained to Sebastian about that? His frustration at his dad's absence, his worries that there wouldn't be a return home. He wondered how Sebastian had managed to sit there and listen to him, how he'd _comforted_ Sam, even though his situation was so, _so_ much worse.

"Shit," Sam says again. He lets go of Sebastian's shoulders, wrapping his arms around his boyfriend's waist instead, pulling him closer. "I'm sorry."

"It's fine, dude," Sebastian replies, sounding unreasonably collected for someone who was just forced to recall their dad's death. "I wasn't even born yet… not like I ever met him."

Sam figures Sebastian meant that last statement to be reassuring, but it just makes him feel even worse. He _knows_ Sebastian; knows that he's probably thought about how his life might have played out differently if his real dad hadn't died… and now Sam's gone and brought the subject up again, on Sebastian's fucking _birthday_ , of all days.

"I guess it can't be all that bad, anyways," Sebastian continues, because Sam's brain is too busy reeling to string proper sentences together. "Probably wouldn't have met you if my mom hadn't remarried."

"I'm sorry," Sam repeats. He presses his forehead against Sebastian's. "You know I don't wanna lose you either, Seb… which is why it _scares_ me, when you say stuff like how you're gonna smoke yourself to death, or how it wouldn't matter if you disappeared. It matters to _me_ , okay?"

"Shouldn't have said that," Sebastian agrees. "I'm sorry, too." He toys with sides of Sam's denim jacket. "Um, if it makes you feel any better… I was thinking of quitting, soon. Trying to, anyways."

"Yeah?" Sam asks, a small smile finally returning to his face. "That's great, Seb."

"Gonna be a bitch, but yeah. My mom'll be happy," Sebastian replies. "And you, so I guess it'll be worth it."

"Fuck yeah, it will," Sam agrees enthusiastically. "Gonna stock up on so much gum at work tomorrow. Do you want some of those patches? I can get you some of those patches. I dunno if Joja carries them, considering we live in a town with a population under fifty, and that includes fucking _farm animals_ , but maybe-"

Sebastian cuts him off with a kiss. It's not a _good_ kiss, because Sam really wasn't prepared for it, but it does effectively shut him up. "We can worry about that later," Sebastian says, once he's pulled back. "We got an appointment to make, remember?"

"Right. Your other birthday gift." Sam steps back, glancing over at the lone helmet sitting on Sebastian's bike. "But, um… only one helmet, remember? Maybe you should wear it; you're the one driving."

"You're wearing it," Sebastian says, dropping it into Sam's hands again. "Look, I can buy another one once we're in Zuzu, okay? We'll have two for the ride home."

Sam groans. "You're not supposed to be buying things for me on your birthday, dude," he complains before pulling the helmet on.

"Just consider it an early Winter Star gift," Sebastian replies. He takes a seat on the bike, and Sam climbs on behind him, wrapping his arms tight around Sebastian's waist. "Ready?"


	2. Chapter 2

"Nervous?" Sebastian asks, as they link hands. After a bit of driving around they'd managed to find a relatively empty underground garage to park the bike.

"Yeah, kinda," Sam replies. Not as nervous as he was about Sebastian driving without a helmet, but he's not about to start that argument again.

"I'll tell them you're a virgin," Sebastian says, smirking.

Sam knows that Sebastian's talking in terms of piercings, not sexual encounters, but he gives him a light shove anyways. "So are you, asshole… you did all of yours at home. That's like… piercing masturbation."

Sebastian laughs. "Not really… but that's a good band name."

"Abby would never go for it," Sam replies with grin.

"Definitely not," Sebastian agrees. He falls silent for a minute, then asks, "So, are you excited to lose it? Afraid it's gonna hurt? You know, I hear it's normal to bleed the first time you get penetrated."

Sam rolls his eyes. He watched Sebastian do his own piercings; he thinks he has a pretty good idea of what to expect. "You're such an ass, Seb." He hesitates, then adds. "I thought that was only for girls, though? Do dudes bleed too when, um… you know?"

Sebastian's look of amusement is quickly replaced by one of concern. "No. It was a joke, Sam."

He breathes a sigh of relief. "Oh. That's good to hear. I think… I think Abby's been fucking with me. She told me, um, she told me there was a lot of blood when she did it. Like, that scene with the elevator in that movie. What movie was it? We watched it together, like, two weeks ago."

"Yeah, dude, she's definitely fucking with you," Sebastian says with a laugh. "I still think she's lying about the whole thing; she's probably just making up some creepy bullshit because she's weird like that."

"I hope so," Sam replies. "I mean, then we could do it first."

Sebastian stops walking, and Sam comes to a stop next to him. "We could tonight, you know," he says, in a low voice. "If you want to. You're already staying over… we could pick up some stuff on our way back."

Sam feels his face heating up. He'd be lying if he said he hadn't thought it since the first night they'd spent together. He'd thought about it a lot, actually. At night, in his bed, or in the shower, with one hand wrapped around himself, pretending that it was Sebastian's hand he was thrusting into. He thought back to earlier, when Sebastian had licked the frosting off his thumb, and how turned on he'd been.

Sam could have that tonight; they're both adults, it wasn't like there wasn't anything stopping them. Haley had even suggested it, as a sort of birthday gift (as if he weren't planning on spoiling Sebastian enough today). And Sam knew it would feel good, so fucking good, to have Sebastian pressed up against him, without any clothing or bedsheets in the way. To have Sebastian's mouth against his own, or against his neck, or maybe around his-

"Sam?" Sebastian interrupts, and Sam lets out a shaky breath.

"I dunno," he says, because that's the honest truth.

He wants to have sex with Sebastian, and he knows Sebastian wants it, too. What he doesn't know is how it's supposed to work. No one's ever taught him how to have sex with another guy – Sam barely knows how the mechanics of having sex with a girl would work.

It's not the stuff like hand jobs that worry him; Sam's pretty sure he's got a solid grasp on that. It's the more… advanced stuff. Things like blow jobs. Sam doesn't know how to blow a dude. How much of it are you supposed to put in? What do you do with your teeth? And then there was butt stuff… Sam didn't even know where to begin with that. He'd worked up the courage to watch some gay porn on one occasion – his cheeks burning the entire time – but it hadn't really answered all of his questions.

Sebastian seems concerned by his silence. He lets go of Sam's hand, reaching out to cup Sam's face instead. "Hey, it's okay. It's okay to say no, Sam. I'm not gonna be mad."

"I know," Sam replies, looking down at the dirty concrete. "Thanks for being cool about it. I just… I don't know if I'm ready, Seb… sorry."

Sebastian presses a kiss to Sam's cheek. "It's fine, Sam, really. Don't apologize." He pulls his hand away from Sam's cheek, and laces their fingers back together again. "Do you still want to sleep over tonight?"

"Yeah, of course," Sam reassures him. "We could, um, still fool around a bit? Nothing heavy, but like, making out and stuff. Like we usually do."

Sebastian squeezes his hand. "That sounds good."

"I want my first time to be with you," Sam adds, because he knows Sebastian has self-esteem issues, and Sam doesn't want Sebastian thinking that the problem is him.

Sebastian smirks. "Maybe we could book a hotel room. Make it special."

"Order some roses," Sam teases. "Sprinkle the petals all over the bed. It's gonna be romantic as fuck."

"Yoba, no," Sebastian says, looking horrified. "You have allergies, Sam; there's nothing sexy about you sniffling your way through the entire time. That's gross."

Thinking about his allergies makes Sam think about noses, and thinking about noses brings up another question that's been on his mind. One that isn't about sex, thankfully. "Hey Seb? How are you gonna blow your nose with a septum piercing? Isn't that gonna be weird?"

Sebastian rolls his eyes. "Like a normal person?" He tugs Sam in the direction of the stairs. "Now let's get out of here; it smells terrible."

Sam laughs. "Not really the most romantic place to have that conversation. Although, I do know a romantic spot we could go after we hit the shop, if you're up for a surprise activity." He waggles his eyebrows at Sebastian.

"I guess I'll trust you," Sebastian agrees, "as long as we're home in time for dinner."

"Of course," Sam promises. "Such a momma's boy."

"Fuck off, you're a momma's boy."

It's nice, being able to hold Sebastian's hand out in the open – although they do get a few dirty looks that Sam really hopes Sebastian doesn't notice. The tattoo parlour is tucked in between a couple of shops – the most interesting of which are a cannabis 'culture' store, and a stag shop with a smiling condom sticker stuck on the window.

"Holy shit dude, it has a cut out for year head," Sebastian laughs, pointing. "We should take a picture with it for Abby. She'd hate it."

"Maybe after we get the piercings," Sam suggests. "Then she'll know we actually went through with them."

He squeezes Sebastian's hand tighter as they enter the shop. "Speaking of Abby, she'd fucking love this place," Sam says as he glances around the entrance. The walls are painted a dusty shade of lavender, and the interior's decorated with lots of dark wood, potted plants, candles, and crystals of all colours.

Sebastian gets them checked in at the front desk, where they each fill out a form. There's a nerve-wracking fifteen minute wait in the shop's small lobby until a lady, who introduces herself as Ebony, finally leads them into a side room.

"Do you want me to go first?" Sebastian offers, while Ebony starts sanitizing the station.

"No, it's okay. I can go first," Sam assures him, hopefully sounding a lot more confident than he feels. "Unless you want to? I dunno, yours is way scarier, dude."

Sebastian smirks. "You first, before you chicken out."

"Which ear are we doing today?" Ebony asks with a cheerful smile, as Sam settles into the chair.

"Uh, the left," he answers. Sam wasn't really sure if there was a 'correct' ear he was supposed to pierce – he'd tried looking it up online, but the answer had varied from site to site, and Abigail had laughed at him when he'd asked her if she knew.

"Got it. So, I'm going to first I'm going to clean your ear, and then we're going to mark the spot you want pierced, okay?"

Sam nods along, reaching for Sebastian's hand as she starts disinfecting his ear. "Relax," Sebastian murmurs, "it'll be over before you know it."

Ebony marks his ear, lets him double check the placement in the mirror, and then the next thing Sam knows, she's got the needle sterilized and ready to go.

There's a sharp, pinching pain, and then it's over, and she's holding a mirror in front of him again. "Awesome," Sam says, admiring his new piercing in the reflection. He grins at Sebastian, who presses a quick kiss to his cheek as Ebony starts prepping a new needle for Sebastian.

Sebastian's piercing is definitely a lot scarier looking than Sam's was. He grips Sebastian's hand (whether it's for his own sake, or Sebastian's he's not actually sure) as Ebony punches the weird hollow needle through Sebastian's septum, and then slides the temporary piercing through it.

"Woah," Sam says. "You're a lot braver than I am, dude."

"Wasn't so bad," Sebastian mumbles, though his voice sounds a little less steady than when Sam was the one sitting in the chair.

Ebony adjusts Sebastian's piercing so that it's flipped up in his nose – "Leave it like that for the first month," she tells him – and then runs them both through their aftercare. Sam takes notes on his phone, because he knows his boyfriend, and he's willing to bet his entire music collection that Sebastian won't bother following it.

"I think I'm gonna get gold hoops for mine," Sam tells Sebastian, once they're out of the shop. "What about you?"

"Something black," Sebastian replies, and Sam rolls his eyes. Sebastian elbows him in response. "Hey, no making fun of my birthday present… I didn't make fun of you for getting a piercing in the gay ear."

Sam groans. "Oh no, is it the left one? I was hoping it was the right."

"Nah, I'm just messing with you." Sebastian grins. "I don't think that's even a thing anymore."

"Asshole," Sam says, as affectionately as he can. "Are you ready for your next birthday surprise?"

"I hope it's a pony," Sebastian replies in a deadpan tone. "You still know your way around the city, right? If we get lost without the motorcycle we're fucked."

"It's really close by," Sam promises.

It's a ten minute walk to the square Sam has in mind, and he's pleased to see that it's just as romantic as he'd imagined when they arrive. There's a small, oval ice rink next to some large, light-up letters that spell out 'Zuzu City'. A couple of arches stretch over one end of the rink, decorated with little dangling star lights for the holiday season.

"A skating rink?" Sebastian asks, as they stop to take in the view.

"Isn't it pretty with all the lights?"

"We're not skating, are we?" Sebastian frowns when Sam doesn't answer. "Sam, we can't go skating; I don't know how, and we don't even have skates. Plus, what if I fall on my face? I just got my nose pierced!"

"You won't fall down, I know how to skate! And we can rent them from the little shop over there, you just need to give them your license," Sam replies. Sebastian gives him a reluctant look. "Please, Sebby? It'll be fun, I promise! My dad used to take me here in the winter when I was a kid."

Sebastian's expression softens at the mention of Sam's dad. "Yeah, okay. Just a few laps, though?"

Sam nods. "A few laps, and then can we get a picture by the Winter Star tree? I thought maybe it would be cute to have a picture as, you know... a couple."

"Okay," Sebastian agrees. "And one picture, Sam. Not twenty."

Sam quickly discovers that getting the skates on Sebastian is the easy part, but getting Sebastian on the ice is a whole different story. "Just don't let go of my hands," he instructs Sebastian, who's still standing on the rubber mat lining the rink. "I won't let you fall, I promise."

"I'm not scared," Sebastian, who's clearly lying, mutters. "I just got my septum pierced. I own a motorcycle. Ice does not scare me."

"Of course not," Sam agrees, "but maybe you could just try putting one foot on the ice? That would be a good start." Sebastian takes a step down onto the ice, and immediately lets go of Sam's hands, wrapping his arms around Sam's middle instead. "Okay, well you did the opposite of what I told you to do, but that works too, I guess."

"Shut up, I'm on the ice," Sebastian mutters. "Now what?"

"Here, take my hands again. I'll skate backwards and pull you along, and then you just need to not let go." Sebastian releases his grip on Sam's waist, and takes Sam's hands again instead. "Warn me if we're about to bump into anyone." Slowly, Sam skates backwards, and Sebastian seems to relax a little.

"I guess this is kind of nice," Sebastian admits, giving Sam a smile that makes his heart flutter.

Sam wants to kiss him, but he's a little scared of bumping Sebastian's nose – or worse, losing their balance, so he settles for a peck on the cheek. Sebastian has other plans, going in for a full kiss on the lips instead, and Sam's glad, because kissing Sebastian in public is even more thrilling than holding his hand.

They manage to get two (very slow) laps in, before the Zamboni comes to clear the ice. Sam gets them some maple bars and hot chocolate from a nearby shop, and they enjoy them together while watching the rink fill up with skaters again.

"Was it as good as you remember it being?" Sebastian asks.

"It's better," Sam decides. "I mean, they didn't have the big sign and stuff when I was a kid." He takes a large sip of his hot chocolate, wincing as it burns his tongue. That was definitely still the same. "I miss doing things with my dad," he continues, once he's able to talk again, "but I think I like this better. Doing things with you. I'm not really sure if things can be the same when he gets back, you know? And I guess things aren't ever going to be the same between us, too, but… it's in a good way." He sighs, leaning into Sebastian's side. "Sorry, did any of that even make sense?"

"Yeah," Sebastian answers, "I know what you mean. Kinda like what I was saying earlier… if I got to choose between growing up with my real dad, or growing up in Pelican Town and meeting you? I think I'd still pick Pelican Town. I really like you, Sam."

"I really like you, too."

Sebastian shoots him a brief smile. "Sorry, I shouldn't be bringing up depressing things again."

"It's okay… it's nice having someone to talk about that sort of stuff with. I mean, we always used to, but… being able to be completely honest now. About how I feel about you."

Sebastian pulls him into a hug. "Hey, let's get that picture," he suggests. "Before things get ridiculous sappy and sad."

"Good idea," Sam agrees, pulling back. "Wouldn't want you to cry and ruin your eyeliner. Someone might confuse you for Gerard Way."

"Hey, I did that just for you," Sebastian protests.

"And I like it!" Sam says, grinning. "Very handsome. Did you swipe one of Abby's pencil's at the sleepover?"

"Abby gave one to me, thank you very much," Sebastian retorts. "She snuck out earlier to drop off my birthday gift. And my gas money. By the way, we need to grab gas on our way back."

"And a helmet!" Sam reminds him. "Come on, let's go get those two girls over there to take our picture. I'm like, ninety percent sure I saw them holding hands on the rink, so they probably won't be rude about it." He waves them down as Sebastian follows after him. "Excuse me, do you mind taking a picture of me and my boyfriend?"

Yoba, it feels so good saying that word out loud.


	3. Chapter 3

Back in Pelican Town, they're greeted at the front door by Robin, and the promising smell of pumpkin soup. They collect their bowls from the kitchen, and then retreat downstairs to snuggle up on Sebastian's bed, in front of an episode of his favourite show.

"You said this wasn't going to be said," Sam complains once the episode's over.

"They lived happily ever after!" Sebastian protests.

"In the afterlife, Seb! That's sad!"

Sebastian sighs. "Well, there's a choose-your-own-adventure one in the new season, but the best ending is pretty sad-"

"No way," Sam interrupts, "I don't wanna watch anything depressing, and I bet that one won't even have any gay girls falling in love in it." He sighs. "Sorry, I shouldn't complain."

"You don't have to like everything I like," Sebastian says with a shrug. He climbs off the bed, and gathers their empty bowls. "I'm going to run these upstairs, before my mom comes looking for them and interrupts us. Do you need anything?"

Sam shakes his head, and Sebastian heads for the door. Settling back on Sebastian's bed, Sam pulls out his phone and opens their group chat with Abigail. He smiles to himself as he pulls up his photo gallery, and taps on the picture of him and Sebastian. It's heartwarming, seeing Sebastian smile in a picture for once, especially _this_ picture – where Sam's arms are wrapped around him, and it's obvious that they're a couple.

He sends the picture to Abigail, who responds in a matter of seconds. " _disgustingly cute_ ," she texts back. " _have u guys touched wieners yet?_ "

" _how do you delete someone elses texts_ ," Sam writes in response.

Abigail sends him a couple pictures of eggplants, so Sam decides to ignore her. Hopefully Sebastian isn't planning on checking his phone for the rest of the night.

The bedroom door opens, and Sam stuffs his own phone back into his pocket as Sebastian joins him on the bed again.

"Hey, how's your ear doing?" Sebastian asks.

"It's good," Sam replies. The pain's settled down into a sort of dull, throbbing sensation. "How about your nose? Are we, uh, still gonna be able to kiss? Or do we have to wait a month? Because that would suck."

Sebastian smirks. "I think it'll be okay. We're definitely not going to last a month, either way." He leans into Sam's side, and rests his hand on Sam's thigh. "I had a really good time today," he continues, tracing circles again Sam's leg with his thumb. Sam glances over at him, and his smirk's softened into a smile. "Probably the best birthday I've had in awhile."

Sam shifts so that he can wrap an arm around Sebastian's shoulders. "I'm so glad to hear that," he says. "I wanted our first date to be perfect."

"Your perfect first date includes getting your ear pierced?" Sebastian teases, raising an eyebrow.

"Well, not exactly," Sam admits, "But still… I wouldn't change anything about today. I mean, I was a little nervous, but I had you there, and you always make me feel comfortable."

"I feel the same when I'm with you," Sebastian murmurs.

The conversations settles into silence, and Sam thinks back to earlier that afternoon. He'd also been nervous when they'd started talking about taking things further, but Sebastian had been so understanding… Sam was so lucky to have him as his boyfriend. It's way too soon to tell Sebastian that he loves him, but Sam knows there's other ways he can get that message across.

He kisses Sebastian's cheek, then moves so that he's straddling Sebastian's lap. Sebastian holds Sam by the waist, slipping his fingers up underneath the hem of Sam's shirt.

Sam pauses, not exactly sure where to begin. He's still a little afraid that he's going to bump Sebastian's new nose piercing if he goes for the mouth, so he aims lower, pressing his lips to the side of Sebastian's throat instead. Sam experiments with a few slow, chaste kisses, before he starts sucking at Sebastian's pale skin. Sebastian seems to really like that, his hands curling into Sam's hair, pulling at it in a way that Sam never thought would feel so good.

He pulls back to catch his breath, and Sebastian tugs at Sam's hair and his shirt, trying to pull him back down for more.

Sam toys with the hem of Sebastian's shirt, glancing at him for permission, before he slides the fabric up a couple of inches. Sebastian bites at his lower lip as Sam stares, tracing circles into Sebastian's sides with his thumbs. Fuck, he's so pretty; pale skin striking against his dark sheets. Sam wants more, wants to see and feel and taste all of Sebastian. He tugs at his own shirt, pulling it over his head and letting it drop over the side of the bed, so that Sebastian won't feel as exposed.

Sebastian sits up too, allowing Sam to help him out of his shirt, then sprawls back against his mattress, tilting his head back to expose more of his neck. Sam takes the hint, dipping down to kiss him again, trailing down his throat and along his collar bone, as Sebastian tugs at Sam's hair again. That, combined with the moans escaping from Sebastian's mouth, already has Sam straining against his jeans.

He wonders if Sebastian can feel how hard he is, how badly Sam needs to free himself from his stupidly tight jeans. He slips a hand between their bodies, struggling to work at the button and zipper on his own pants. Finally, he sits back again, using both hands to undo them.

"You can take them off, if you want," Sebastian suggests, eyeing Sam's pants. "I'll take mine off, too."

It's a tempting offer, and he knows Sebastian won't push him to get fully naked if he's not ready to. Sam nods, climbing off Sebastian to ditch his pants, while Sebastian lifts his hips off the bed to do the same. He straddles Sebastian again as soon they've both stripped down to their underwear, and his breath catches in his throat as he glances down at the growing bulge between Sebastian's legs.

Sebastian watches him, hands gently rubbing Sam's sides as he waits for Sam to make the first move.

Sam's sporting a similar-sized bulge in his own boxers, and the memory of the last time he'd gotten aroused in front of Sebastian is still fresh in his mind. He imagines what might've happened if Abigail hadn't interrupted them - Sebastian stroking him through his thin sweatpants, planting kisses down Sam's body, pausing just above his waistband - and Sam knows what he wants to do next.

He picks up where he left off – kissing Sebastian's neck, and then his collarbone, before trailing down his chest, towards the thin line of red hair that disappears down past the waistband of Sebastian's black boxer briefs. He hesitates, before kissing the bulge of Sebastian's cock over the fabric of his underwear, and the gasp that elicits from Sebastian is well worth it.

He presses another kiss there, and Sebastian tugs at his hair, this time using it to gently guide Sam back up to his lips. Sam rocks himself against Sebastian as they kiss, moaning into Sebastian's mouth.

"I wanna take things further," Sam gets out between kisses. "I'm ready."

"You're sure?" Sebastian asks, pulling back to look Sam in the eyes. Sam nods. "What do you want to do?"

He blushes. "Um, maybe we could take the rest of our clothes off first?" He wants to feel all of Sebastian, to feel the warmth of his skin against Sam's own, without any fabric separating them.

Sebastian nods, and Sam climbs off the bed so that Sebastian can get his boxer briefs off, and Sam can do the same. It's a little nerve-wracking getting naked in front of another guy for the first time, and that feeling amplifies when Sam takes a peek at Sebastian, and realizes that Sebastian's dick looks… different.

Oh, Yoba. Maybe there's something wrong with Sam's dick.

He wonders if it would be too late to pull his boxers back on and back out. No, that would probably freak Sebastian out. It's entirely possible that Sebastian has a weird dick, and Sam definitely does not want to hurt his feelings if he does.

"Huh," Sebastian says, breaking the silence first. "I didn't know you were circumcised."

"I, uh... I didn't realize that wasn't normal for everyone?" Sam replies. "I kinda just thought all dicks looked like that." He laughs nervously. "I was really worried for a second."

"You don't have anything to be worried about, dude."

"Well that's good," Sam says, "I'm glad you don't think I have a weird dick." He leans in for a kiss, and realizes that Sebastian's the one looking unsure now. "Hey, what's wrong?"

"Nothing." He's not looking Sam in the eyes anymore, so that's clearly a lie.

Sam grabs his hand. "Seb, come on, you can talk to me about anything. Did I do something wrong? Or say something?"

He shakes his head. "It's not you, Sam, it's just… do you really find me attractive? Honestly. Because you're really hot, and I really don't understand how you could have a body like that, and then see mine and think 'yeah, I'm into that'."

"I've had a crush on you forever, dummy," Sam replies. "You can't possibly think it was _just_ because of your charming personality."

Sebastian shrugs. "Well I don't exactly have much else to offer."

"You're really smart," Sam begins, "like _really_ smart, Sebastian. And you're really cool. And I don't care what anyone else thinks, I really like the way you look. Do you know how long it took me to find, uh… videos with guys like you?"

"I mean, I guess," Sebastian replies. He tucks his hair back behind his ear with his free hand. "So you don't think I'm too skinny, or small, or awkward?"

"I think you're gorgeous," Sam tells him. Is that a weird compliment to give a dude? Sam thinks 'handsome' sounds too much like something a mom would say.

Sebastian pulls him into an appreciative kiss all the same, so Sam must have made the right choice.

His cock brushes up against Sebastian's as he deepens the kiss, and Sam's reminded of what they were intending on doing. "Hey Sebby?" he asks, pulling back. "Um, do you wanna pick up where we left off?"

It doesn't take them long to get there; Sebastian gives him a light shove in the direction of the bed, and then climbs on top of Sam. His hands are back in Sam's hair, and it's like the first night they made out together, except it's so much better without pants on.

He rocks his hips upwards, moaning as he rubs up against Sebastian again. "You know what?" Sam murmurs, and Sebastian acknowledges his question with a hum of pleasure. "You've got a really cute butt." He squeezes it for emphasis.

"Nerd," Sebastian mumbles, but he seems pretty pleased with the compliment. "Want to try anything else?" he asks, sitting up a little. "Or do you wanna keep making out?"

Sam wasn't expecting them to even get this far, but now that they were he didn't want to stop. He's still not sure that he's ready for anything advanced - like a blowjob, for example - but he does want to do something that's at least a little special for Sebastian. "Um, maybe I could get you off, and then you could get me off?"

"What about both of us at the same time?" Sebastian suggests.

"Yeah," Sam agrees, nodding eagerly. "I wanna do that."

Sebastian climbs off his lap, and Sam whines as he pulls away. "So impatient," Sebastian mutters. He rolls over, rummaging around under his bed for a moment, and then he pops back up with a large plastic tube of lotion in his hand. "Thought you might want this."

"That's a lot of lotion, man," Sam teases, as Sebastian passes him the tube.

Sebastian groans as he sits up. "My mom just left it in my room one day. It was fucking embarrassing, dude."

"Are you serious?" Sam pauses mid squeeze. "Yoba, that's horrifying. Although, I guess it could be worse… I'm pretty sure my mom thinks touching yourself is a sin." Sam doesn't even want to know what his mom would think of what he's about to do with Sebastian. His heart's been racing since they started making out, and it feels like it's beating even faster in anticipation of what's coming next. "She's almost walked in on me so many times… fuck, I wish I had a lock."

"Hey Sam? Shut up," Sebastian says, tugging him into another kiss. "Not gonna stay hard for long if you keep talking about your mom."

"Sorry," Sam mumbles against Sebastian's lips.

"Give me that back." Sebastian takes the lotion back from Sam, squeezing some out onto his hand, before wrapping it around Sam.

Sam reaches for Sebastian, too – it's a little weird, trying to jerk off another dude, but it doesn't take him long to find an angle that works. Sebastian groans as Sam strokes him, and Sam uses his other arm to pull Sebastian closer, so that he's sitting in Sam's lap.

"Oh, Sebby," Sam moans, as Sebastian swipes his thumb over the head of Sam's dick. It feels different, but good, really fucking good, having Sebastian's slender hand squeezing and stroking his cock.

"Your hand feels so fucking big," Sebastian murmurs, as he thrusts into it. Sam wonders if he can fit his hand around both their dicks.

"Hey, stop for a second," Sam says, his voice breathy and uneven. "I wanna try something." He pulls Sebastian even closer, and then takes both of their cocks in his hand, stroking them together.

"Fuck," Sebastian gasps, his head falling forward so that it rests against Sam's shoulder. "Don't stop."

Sam presses his head against Sebastian, and pumps harder. It feels incredible, getting to be this intimate with Sebastian, and Sam can only imagine how magical their first time is going to be. Sebastian's fingers slip into his free hand - still slippery from the lotion - but it's such a sweet, tender gesture, and Sam wants the moment to last forever.

Forever, as it turns out, doesn't last very long.

Sam's cock twitches as he comes, and that seems to send Sebastian over the edge, too. Sam lets go of his hand so that he can wrap an arm around his waist instead, holding Sebastian close as Sam works him through his orgasm.

They stay like that for a few minutes, breathing heavily. Sebastian releases Sam's hand, looping both arms around his waist instead. It's nice, being able to bask moment with his boyfriend, rather than immediately scrambling to clean up, and hide any evidence from his family.

(One time he'd accidentally left a rather explicit picture open on his web browser, and his little brother had _almost_ hopped on his computer to play a game.)

With that horrifying memory in mind, Sam decides they should probably clean up, before their luck runs out and someone comes downstairs to interrupt them.

Sam glances around for something they could use to clean themselves off. He can't see any tissues, and he really doesn't want to use his shirt, so he grabs a fistful of the bedsheets, and makes a futile attempt to wipe up the semen that's spilled all over his hand, stomach, and Sebastian's lap.

"Dude, stop." Sebastian bats his hand away. "You're gonna make an even bigger mess… let's just take a quick shower, okay?"

He frowns. "Isn't your mom gonna wonder why we're taking a shower together? At night?"

Sebastian raises an eyebrow. "I wasn't suggesting we take one together, but if _you_ want to… I mean, I'm not gonna say no to sex twice in one night, if that's what you're getting at. Maybe give it a few minutes, though."

Sam freezes. "Wait, did that count? I thought sex was when you… go all the way?" Sebastian looks concerned by that, and Sam tries to backpedal. "Not that I didn't like it! I'm glad we did it, I just… I wanted our first time to be special? Like we were talking about earlier."

"Look, Sam… virginity is a made up concept anyways, like time, or aliens..."

"Fuck off," Sam replies, managing a laugh. "Aliens are totally real."

"Sure," Sebastian agrees. "So if you decide your virginity is intact until you get abducted by aliens and probed up the ass, then whatever, you know? It doesn't matter." He runs a hand through Sam's hair. "What matters is that you enjoyed it, and that you wanted to do it."

"Of course I wanted to do it," Sam replies. He looks down at the mess they've made. "I was just worried that maybe it wasn't good enough."

"Don't be," Sebastian says, as he pulls Sam closer, "that was great." He presses a quick kiss to Sam's lips. "You were great."

"You were, too," Sam assures him.

Sebastian kisses him again. "We can still have a special first time, if that's what you want. We'll work our way up until you're comfortable okay? And then when we're both ready to go all the way, we can call that our first time."

"That sounds perfect," he agrees. "Thanks, Sebby."

"Now come on, let's get in the shower," Sebastian says, getting up from Sam's lap. "Here, put your boxers back on; we can toss them in the wash after… along with my sheets. I am _not_ sleeping on those."

Their quick shower takes them much longer than anticipated - Sebastian doesn't have a full-size shower in the basement bathroom, and Sam's having a hard time keeping his hands off Sebastian with the way they're pressed up together in the small shower stall. Eventually they manage to get cleaned off - with only a minimal amount of groping and kissing.

The washing machine is tucked in the basement bathroom, too, and Sebastian loads it with his sheets and their underwear, as Sam scrambles to find something to change into.

"I can't believe you didn't pack pajamas," Sebastian mutters, measuring out some liquid laundry detergent. "Or another pair of boxers, or _socks_. How many times have you slept over already? You could just leave some clothes here."

"I was in a hurry!" Sam protests. "I wanted to see my boyfriend!"

Sebastian's face goes pink. He quickly turns his back to Sam, gripping his towel tightly with one hand as he bends over to open the dryer. "Here, take these," he says, pulling out a pair of pajama pants, and tossing them to Sam. "I guess I'll wear the frog ones tonight."

Sam pulls on the the pants - they're a little too tight, and definitely too short, but he does think they make his ass look pretty great. He grins when he looks up at Sebastian, whose new pajamas fit perfectly. "Aww Sebby, they're so cute!"

"Shut up," Sebastian mutters, as his cheeks go from pink to red. This time he hides them by ducking into the bathroom closet, emerging with a set of flannel, Solarian Chronicles-themed sheets a moment later.

"Dude! I remember those!" Sam exclaims. "I can't believe you still have them."

"They're emergency sheets," Sebastian replies with a shrug. "You know, for when you spill black nail polish on your bed, or you get sick, or your boyfriend gets cum all over your sheets." It's Sam's turn to blush now, and Sebastian grins at him.

"It wasn't _all over_ , dude," Sam mutters, "and some of it was yours!"

They exit the bathroom half-dressed with the bundle of clean sheets, and find Robin at the top of the stairs. "Do you need something, boys?" she asks, peering down at them. "I thought I heard the washing machine going."

"We spilled some soup on the bed earlier," Sebastian lies.

"Oh, do you want any help cleaning up?" she asks, with a look of concern. "You should have said something sooner, I could have done the laundry for you!"

"Nope," he answers quickly, "no, that's okay mom. We've got it under control. We didn't wake you up, did we?"

Robin shakes her head. "No, I was just getting ready to go to bed. Let me know if you need anything though, alright? Oh, and do the pajamas fit okay, Sebby?" She hasn't seemed to notice that Sam's wearing Sebastian's old pajamas, or that they've both got wet hair. At least if she does, she doesn't comment on it.

"Yeah mom, they're fine. Thanks. We'll see you in the morning."

"Goodnight!" Robin chirps.

"Night," Sebastian replies with a nod. He then grabs Sam by the arm, and pulls him back into his bedroom.

"Do you think she knows?" Sam asks, once they've got the new sheets on the bed.

"Yoba, I hope not," Sebastian groans. "She'd probably try to leave me a box of condoms next. If she's even cool with the whole gay thing, that is."

Sam's nervous about his parents finding out, too, but he pushes those thoughts aside to reassure Sebastian instead. "Hey, don't worry about that tonight. Your mom loves you, and she shouldn't stop just because you're gay." He pulls Sebastian into a hug. "She's always said that she just wants you to be happy. And I make you happy, right?"

"Of course," Sebastian answers, resting his head against Sam's shoulder. "What about you?"

"You've always made me happy, Sebby," Sam replies, squeezing him.

"You're such a sap," Sebastian complains, although he's grinning.

Sam shoves him onto the freshly-made bed. "Please, you love it when I get sappy."

He climbs onto the bed with Sebastian, who rolls over to snuggle into Sam's side. Sam wants to memorize that feeling forever, too. The gentle weight of Sebastian's head pillowed on his chest, his soft hair as Sam threads his fingers through it, the light patterns Sebastian's tracing into his side with his slender hands. He grins into Sebastian's hair, pressing a kiss to the top of his head.

"Happy birthday, sunshine," he murmurs.


End file.
